Friends Who Desire Only Pleasure
Hakim al-Ummat Hadhrat Mawlana Ashraf Ali Thanawi (ra) said,
“If family members, close friends and other acquaintances do not love you anymore then be content that Allah, Most High made this a means for your heart to turn away from everything other-than-Him (ghair-Allah).”Mullah Jami states the following in His Baristan:,
Ma-sir Hakim al-Umma ra, pa 387
A Man completed his prayers and then began his supplications, desiring to enter paradise and to be delivered from the fire of hell. An Old Woman, who happened to be seated at the rear of the masjid, and heard him said. " O Lord, cause me to share in whatever he supplicates for."The Love Of Two Days
The man who had listened to the woman then said: " O Lord, hang me on a gibbet and cause me to die of scourging." The Woman continued: " O Lord Pardon me and preserve me from what he asked for." The man then turned in her direction and said: " What a wonderfully unpleasant partner this is! she desires to share with me in all that brings rest and pleasure, but refuses to be my partner in distress and misery."
Something to reflect.
Many people fall into the above trap, and become embroiled in illicit relationships, and destructive companionships of friends who encourage towards Haram. . In due course they end up, far removed from the deen. When calamity arrives, neither those friends nor those Lovers who sang rhymes of Love are to be found.
Mullah Jami narrates:
A beautiful woman had many admirers, whose attentions where so assiduous that the very street in which she she lived became thronged by visitors, but when her attractions disappeared and she had become ugly her lovers abandoned her. Then I said to one of them: " She is the same friend as before, with the same eyes, brows, lips, but perhaps her stature is less tall and her body more stout. It is faithless and treacherous on thy part to neglect her."
He replied: "Alas for what thou sayest! That which ravished the heart, and enthralled the senses, was the spirit which resided in her form, in the gracefulness of her limbs, the smoothness of her complexion, and the pleasantness of her voice, but as that spirit has departed from the figure, how can I love a dead body, or show affection to a whithered rose?"
In his Baharistan (Abode of Spring), Mullah Jami narrates the following:
The dialogue of lovers.Signposts on Seekers Highway
The Beautiful Maiden.
"By God, who openly and secretly is worshipped by men and Jinns, I swear of all whom i see in the world no one is dearer to me than thou."
The Handsome Youngman.
"O thou who sawest me, and residest in my heart, soul and body all now belong to thee it is no wonder; It, must be a stone not a heart, which turns not to thee!"
The girl replied that now her only desire was that they should spent time alone in each others embrace.
The Youngman replied.
"My desire is the same, but what can I do? As God the most high says: ' The intimate friends on that day shall be enemies unto one another except the pious,' which means that on the day of resurrection friendship of friends will become enemity, except the friendship of the abstemious, which will increase the attachment. I do not wish that on the morn of resurrection the edifice of our love impaired, and our friendship be turned into enmity." After saying these words, he departed saying the following: "O heart, abandon this love of two days, because a love of two days profits not; choose a love where with on the day of reckoning. Thou mayest abide in the eternal abode."
If one wants to know whether one is climbing upwards toward success, there are certain signs and indications that can help one to determine one's progress.
1) As one becomes more knowledgeable, one becomes more humble and merciful to others. Think of an expensive pearl: the more heavy and valuable it is, the more deep it is in the ocean. A wise person knows that though knowledge is a gift, Allah tests the one whom He gives it to. When one is thankful for the gift of knowledge, one will be raised in ranking.
"Allah will exalt in degree those of you who believe, and those who have been granted knowledge."
2) The more one performs good deeds, the more one becomes cautious and fearful, in the sense that he does not feel secure from error, such as a slip of the tongue or a change of heart. He is always in a state of watching over himself and of being wary. He is like a careful bird: each time it lands on a tree, it soon leaves it for another, afraid of the skilled hunter and his bullet.
3) The older one gets, the less covetous one should be for this world, because he knows with certainty that his time is soon finished.
4) The more wealthy one becomes, the more generous should one be toward others. The wealthy Muslim must understand that his wealth is a trust given to him, and that Allah is testing him in that wealth.
5) The higher one's status becomes in society, the closer should one be to ordinary people, showing humility and fulfilling their needs.
The signs that indicate wretchedness and misery:
1) The more knowledge one attains, the more haughty and arrogant he becomes. Such a person's knowledge is not beneficial. His heart is empty and his company heavy to bear.
2) The more he increases in deeds, the more proud he becomes and the more contemptuous he becomes of others. He doesn't give the benefit of the doubt to anyone except to his own self. Thus, he deems that he is the only one who achieves salvation while all others are bound for destruction.
3) The older he gets, the more avarice and cupidity become part of his character. He gathers, but he never shares. Calamities and misfortune fail to move him into becoming a benefactor to others.
4) The more wealthy he becomes, the more miserly he becomes.
5) The higher his position in society, the higher his level of arrogance and haughtiness.
Source: Don't be Sad - Shaykh Aaidh ibn Abdullah Al-Qarni
From "Starting with the Self", a thread on SunniForum.com.